Rejection

Last night, I walked into the gym to find my daughter sitting on the floor against the wall with her head down. She had just finished a tryout for one of the top girls’ basketball summer teams. I immediately knew that look & what it meant. Ignoring my instincts, I asked her how the tryout went & if she made the team. She thought she did alright, but made some mistakes. The coach had supposedly already talked to the parents of the girls that made the team. He never walked over to me.

I began to remember the many basketball tryouts that I went to & the many rejections - “You’re not good enough”, “We have enough guards”, “You’re too skinny” & the classic “Don’t call us, we’ll call you”. With every rejection doubt, frustration, anger & fear constantly ate at me & pushed my dream further & further away. So it tore me up inside when I knew that my daughter was now having those same feelings & this moment could be the end of it all for her.

The interesting thing is that I had just traveled 32 miles to see her at the end of the tryout. On my way to the tryout, I was fighting something trying to tell me that this trip was a waste of time, gas & money - you would probably only see her for 15 minutes, if that. But I kept telling myself that I want to be there when they announce she made the team. Never even thinking that she might not make the team.

So after consoling & encouraging my daughter, I began my trip back home. As I drove, I began to remember tryout after tryout & rejection after rejection. I remembered the hard work & practice hours I had put in to make the necessary improvements. Then I recalled that one question that always ate at me - Why? Why did I have to keep getting rejected?

After finally making a couple of semi-professional teams, I thought that the rejection was for me to appreciate the acceptance. Every rejection made making the teams so much sweeter. However, now I see that my thought process was a little flawed. My rejections were also for that moment when I walked in the gym & I saw my daughter’s head down. My rejections were so that I can be to my daughter what I never had, someone who understood every emotion & pain that you feel when you’ve given it all & it wasn’t enough. So I can be a parent that understands how it feels for your dream to be right there in front of you & you can’t have it. My rejections were so I can navigate my daughter through one of the most difficult times in her life.

Thank you rejection for preparing me for this moment & making me a better father.

“What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?” - Romans 8:31 (NKJV)